Love is

So I have been thinking for some time now that as you grow up it become increasingly difficult to love and be loved by someone. Now Im not talk about infatuation and that cutsy shit where you imagine cupid as a baby with a bow and arrow...

and while were are on that topic lets discuss what would happen, shall we? Baby- likes to suck on things and put stuff in their mouth + sharp pointy arrows= a bloody mess. Not a pretty picture, and I recomend you think of it more like the Greeks, a giant massive serpent that will consume you and drive you insane!

But I digress to my former argument...the older you get the more complicated love becomes by exponential powers. Let me explain this a little more clearer:

When I was a kid all I had to do was to go up to my mother and say "Mumu i wuv yu" and she would immediately show you with praise and love and affection. This is usually true, even if you are a second or third child. On Mother's day all you had to do was paste a picture of some other random mess (macaroni and glue anyone?) onto a paper plate and she would magically give you a hug and kiss. Easy-peasy.

Moving forward a little, Elementary school. Remember Valentine's day? You had to bring cupcakes for the whole class and you were sure to save the best one for your best friend (boy or girl) and maybe one for the teacher. But everyone HAD to bring cards for everyone. Not bad, you could even enjoy some of those hard peppermint candies. But what if you were one of those kids who didnt get and cards? Well you felt left out didn't you? Still, it was easy compared to what came next.

Jr. High and High school: The time of life when your social insecurity was the greatest and yet most of you still found a date for Sadee Hawkins. The single carnation for your special one and the others for friends. But there is nothing that screws with insecurity and validation like seeing everyone get something and you dont even get one from yourself.  Why? Something, you think, must be wrong with you? But you dont even think about it. You just keep trucking. Ok so you've survived the land mines of High school.  Getting to love someone and visa versa is getting harder, the field is getting more selective and youre running out of time. Now what?

Well, you're ready for college. Endless sporting events and beer can only help you so much. Now's the time to experiment with your dating techniques. Chat up women. Easy. Pretend you aren't looking for a good time. You dont even care that you're here. Pretend you know something about some random obscure thing: Maybe you're a wine snob....spout off some facts about Pinot gregio. Oh shit her father owns a vineyard? Walk away, quick! Don't shoot yourself in the foot! Oh God she's following you. Run RUN!!!! Oh wait, she's inviting you to her dad's vineyard? Well maybe the free wine tasting wont be so bad? Ok she's giving you her number. You promise to call her.

You better call her.

Then you go on an outing, or like an official date...pray you dont embarrass yourself. Or, you know what fuck it! Embarrass the hell out of yourself! Make her laugh her ass off. You remember that time your best friend in high school convinced you to enter a pie eating contest and you had already filled up on pop corn...go with that. Or something else.


God this is complicated. What happen to the days you used to be able to say I love you to a girl and she would melt like butter?